KAA: East Coast Bias

The reason its taken me so long to write about Kanan Across America's New England experience is that it was very low key, I didn't get to do many of the traditional things to do in New England:

• I couldn't enjoy the foliage because it was summer
• I didn't get gay married
• I didn't wear a tweed jacket
• I wasn't able to attend any Ivy league schools

That last one I did try, however it didn't work out as planned.  I was in Boston, which I had previously visited, though hadn't seen much of the city.  It occurred to me to check out Harvard, one of the smartest places on earth, where I did one of the dumbest things I've ever done.  It was night time, and the street lighting in Boston leaves a lot to be desired.  I simply couldn't get to where the GPS was directing me!  So I saw a bus that said Harvard Square and decided to follow, and I ended following it all the way to a bus-only tunnel bus stop... FAIL!  Embarrassed I decided to get out of Boston as fast as possible!

I did get to hang out with my old Mil-Lab buddies in Vermont, which was awesome, finally getting to see Rutland in all its glory after hearing so much about it! =P  It was annoying constantly getting weird looks from people around the capital, probably b/c I was wearing a Texas shirt.  I've always believed that extreme liberalism can be just as close minded as extreme conservatism.  Oh well, c'est la vie.

This is what I expected all buildings to look like =P

Vermont: America's Vagina

Quechee Gorge

I wonder where this person stands on the issues...

My next stop was Manchester, NH, home of the famous British soccer team.  The town was incredibly nice and well kept, I was under the impression that it was the capital of the state, but apparently they too decided to relocate recently.

I had decided not to eat anything when I left the Emmons Estate in Vermont because I fully intended to feast on Maine lobster.  Maine was a state I was really excited to see, especially the part of Maine that isn't in Canada.  Unfortunately a nasty thunderstorm hit me on the way from Manchester to Portland, I had to pull over a couple of times due to no visibility, but I eventually made it to Portland in the late afternoon.

There I had another 'first,' I touched the Atlantic Ocean for the first time!!!!!  Took a boat tour of the harbor, which wasn't as beautiful as it should've been due to the gray skies, but heck I was happy they had tours in such weather to begin with!  Afterwards, it was LOBSTER TIME!

Never Thought I'd Be On a Boat...

It's a Big Blue Watery Road...

Poseidon, LOOK AT ME!!!!

My goal was to spend the night in Providence, RI, which is way bigger than I imagined, that's what she said, so I ended up getting lost looking for the Motel 6.  As impressed as I was by Providence as a city, I found it was incredibly dead for 11pm and I couldn't think of any 'must have' experiences.  I was probably too bummed out by there not being a Quahog, RI, that I decided to move along.

Suddenly, as Kanan Across America continued to steamroll across New England, I felt this horrible feeling.  I couldn't pinpoint what it was, all I remember was this awful headache and started hating all things University of Texas, I was sick to my stomach.  I suddenly craved SEC football, Yanks/Sox, and Lakers basketball, WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?!  That's when I saw the sign:

I needed to get out of Connecticut fast!  Actually, I did try to see if they offered some sort of ESPN campus tour, but the gate guard didn't let me in, I reckon my UT shirt was burning his retinas.

So like I said, a very low key New England experience, truth be told there were a lot of museums and points of interest, but they were simply out of my financial reach, maybe next time.

Your American Hero,
-AK

KAA: Chasing Waterfalls

Contrary to popular belief, Jim and Pam's wedding was not the most romantic thing to happen in Niagara Falls this year.  Earlier this summer I decided to spend a magical evening with the person I love the most at Niagara.

<3

I had always heard that the Canadian side of the falls was more scenic, and when I arrived I was afraid that was shockingly true.  I parked in an area called Terrapin Point, not knowing that there are other points, so I was bummed because you don't get a good view of the falls, so all you can see is the edge of the water about to fall.  To make matters worse, I had decided not to take my passport, so crossing over to get the better view, not cool.

So after about 45 minutes of trying to get a good look and not being able to, I found a black, I mean African American squirrel.  After chasing this squirrel, whom I named Mike (is that the correct usage of 'whom'?), I grabbed a diet pepsi and people watched on a bench.  Enter trolley!  I jumped on this trolley thinking to myself 'why not?'  Several stops later I get out at something called 'The Visitor's Center.'  Turns out THATS where you want to go!

The REAL Niagara Falls view totally blew my mind!  Fortunately for me the observation deck wasn't too crowded, so I got a good chunk of staring & wandering off time.  SUCK IT CANADA!

After a good few hours, it was dinner time.  You shouldn't have to guess that I was going to get myself some buffalo wings.  Went to Anchor Bar, home of the original buffalo wings.  The Verdict?  Good, not great, though the atmosphere is terrific.

Your American Hero,

-AK

KAA: An Appalachian Affair

Its hard to believe that one could experience all Appalachia has to offer culturally in just one day, but if there's anyone that can come to appreciate bourbon, coal, and steel in a mere 24 hours, it is me!

I started the morning in Cincinnati, a much nicer city than anything else Ohio had thrown at me so far!  I got the opportunity to goof around downtown in the morning, which for a major city (and one I assume to be full of yuppie east coast hipsters due to P&G) was really dead!  I actually don't mind that, got to enjoy some of the downtown architecture.  I was really disappointed to find out that The Great American Ballpark was actually named after The Great American Insurance Company :( I always wondered if some great baseball something had once taken place in Cincinnati.  I was also there too early to get Skyline chili, that's a double :( :(

Take Me To Kentucky!

First off, when did Louisville and Lexington stop being the capital of Kentucky?  I received no memo, no email, no text, no tweet, no nothing!  The state recently decided to move the capital to a town called Frankfort, which is halfway between the two.  Due to the fact that I was heading northeast I decided to skip Louisville in the interest of efficiency.  Check out the Kentucky bluegrass, its really blue!  If its not showing please adjust your tint settings.

Lexington was on the way, thankfully enough, home of the University of Kentucky, where I was hoping to rendezvous with Ashley Judd.

Take Me Home, Country Roads... West Virginia!

Driving through West Virginia was actually a very fun affair!  I love driving through mountains, tons of hills and fun turns, and a refreshing lack of trucks made driving through the entire state a joy.  I stopped in Charleston to see the capitol, but didn't stick around for too long because I wanted to make it to WVU before nightfall.  I did get to Morgantown in time, unfortunately the campus was damn near impossible to find.  I did get to see some of the campus and the football stadium.

West Virginia Coal Miner Tribute, SUCK IT HIPPIES!

Finally made it to Pittsburgh, where finding a hotel room was not easy, I guess a lot of folks were in town for either the nearby Pro Football Hall of Fame induction or the likelier scenario, for a Pirates game ZING!  I didn't have much of an agenda for the steel city, just a little sightseeing.

How nice of Pittsburgh to name a street after Dallas Cowboy Legend Tony Dorsett for no reason whatsoever!

Your American Hero,
-AK

KAA: Big Ten Country

It is hard to be a college football fan and not know about the history and tradition of Notre Dame, but it is damn near incomprehensible why the sports media clings so dearly to a program that was last seen near relevancy in 1993.  So I decided to go to the source, Touchdown Jesus himself:

It was clear that I wasn't going to get any answers from TDJ, but at least I'm glad I met him.  I had originally planned not to drive through IN because I wanted to see Lake Superior, poke Canada, and invade Michigan from the north, plus I had spent a few days in Indianapolis a couple of years back.  The curious thing about driving through Indiana is that I-90 is a tollway through the state, now some places like New York have tollways because they are places people really want to go, my theory is that for IN it is the exact opposite, you're gonna have to pay to get out!  (They probably stole that from Jersey)

As I resigned myself to the destination equivalent of an unwanted child, I tried to make the most of it, surely there had to be more than just Notre Dame, and there was!  I visited the College Football Hall of Fame, also in South Bend, IN.  To be honest I was expecting a Notre Dame shrine, and you can't blame me, but surprisingly this is an objective institution that didn't show much bias outside of the Michigan/ohio st exhibit, read my full review on yelp at http://kanan.yelp.com

My next destination was Ann Arbor!  Now I've never made it a secret that I like Michigan, its actually the college football team I rooted for as a child (I was a sucker for cool helmets and bright colors) and I routinely play as UM in NCAA football games.  Oddly enough most of my Seattle friends are Michigan alums, so barred the occasional rose bowl I always say Go Blue, I was excited to finally visit!

Unfortunately I was not able to get a good tour of the Big House because of some construction that was taking place, but I did my best to do as much checking out as possible.  Afterwards I just walked around campus for as long as my legs would allow me, fortunately it wasn't too crowded.

I could definitely see why Michigan and ohio state are such biter rivals, Ann Arbor and Columbus are like night and day.  Columbus sucks, plain and simple, and don't say I didn't give them a chance because I did!  Lets start with not being able to get there from an Interstate, WTF?!  I drove hours through a series of 2-lane highways that showed me more of the Ohio countryside than anyone should ever see, EVER!  I finally get to Columbus, tired and hungry, its night time, I find a McDonald's and THE NUGGETS WERE STALE!  Stale Chicken McNuggets are unacceptable regardless of location!  Strike 2.  I thought it was time to call it a night and headed towards the osu campus area to find a motel, NOTHING!  You could argue this is bad timing on my part because orientation was happening, but I blame columbus for sucking.  Strike 3, they were out!

Frustrated I decided I wasn't going to stay there and anything I wanted to checkout would have to happen that night.  I headed to the Horseshoe, which is a pretty impressive stadium, even at night, unfortunately my camera does not take very good night pics, but you get the gist.  Before heading out I stopped downtown, which was much nicer than I expected, unfortunately my mind was made, I was not spending the night in Columbus... Cincinnati was much nicer to me, more on that later :)

Your American Hero,

-AK